Visual Gratitude Log

Today I got a bright idea and did something different. I actually took picures of the things I was grateful for. Hope you enjoy!


1. I'm grateful for lakes. I enjoy them whether they're resevoirs or lakes. I had lunch today as I looked at Echo Reservoir (top). Then on the way to Kamas from Coalville, I drove past Mirror Lake (bottom). They are fun to see, to relax by and to recreate in.

2. I'm grateful for Fruit n' Yorgurt parfaits at McDonalds. I can always look forward to this afternoon snack at the McDonalds by the Park City exit on the freeway, just before I head for home.
3. I'm grateful for captioned TV in public places! I love it everytime I find a TV with captions in a public place, so I can enjoy it too. I got to enjoy my McDonald's snack while I watched CNN captioned!
4. I'm grateful for public trash cans! Yes! When you travel all day in your car, garbage easily piles up. It's nice to be able to dump all my water bottles, pop cans, lunch packagaing, snack packaging piling on the seat next to me, when I see one of those right by me.

5. I'm grateful for the feeling of the sun on my face. I couldn't quite take a picture of the sun shining on me. Taking a picture of what I could see in the sky above me seemed like the next best thing!

Whew! Getting this all set up in the blog was hard, but it was a fun day! I wasn't happy with my gratitude log yesterday. I felt like I was just looking back at the day, trying to find something to be grateful for, rather than living gratefully. Today, I made sure I was looking hard for things to be grateful for and documenting it. The result? I felt my day was so much fuller of joy and bliss. Looking hard for things to be grateful for and making sure I acknowledged them right then and there had an impact on me. Today was so good, that I decided to duplicate my gratitude log here on my regular blog, not write about anything else today.

Future Jenny Craig Coommercial?

Camera focuses briefly on words, or narrator says: Based on true story. (Because this really happened this week!)

Scene: Car with a mom driving a car, 3 year old in their car seat in the back, with Ann sitting next to mom in the front.

3 year old: Mom, I'm hungry.

Mom: We're going home right now and I will make you some lunch. What do you want for lunch?

3 year old: I like Ann's food!

Camera focuses on Ann's before and after picture, then fades! :)

Simple commercial but get's the message how delicious the food is, and how easy the program is if a 3 year old prefers their food over anything else! :) What do you think?

Want a New Body?

I'm a little hyper and overexcited today! It's another awesome day! Of course I started out the day perfectly, with a present of a 4.2 lb loss this week!!!!!!! YAY!!! Last week I was so thrilled to be just under 20 lbs from goal. This week I all of a sudden found myself at 15.5 lbs from goal! For the running tally, it's now 214.6 lbs loss. I'm so excited, I need to find some time to go try on my pants that have been very tight on me and see if there is any more give and they are any looser! First, I'll finish my blog! It's 1:00 in the morning, I have a meeting to be to at 8:30 in the morning, but I'm ready to go run in and try on clothes! Dear me!

Today I went into the office to do some moving. We've been moving our office this summer. Up until today, they hadn't not put our carousels together, so we had no desks and were unable to do a thing. They finally built "most" of the desk, except mine....even though I'm the first one to start back to schools, as my school districts start the earliest. I return to work for the year on Monday.

That however isn't what I want to write about. I want to write about the moving. When I showed up, there was a lot needing to be done. There were two people there. They had been working for a while, but there were still a ton of boxes piled in the center of the room. We decided to take the boxes and put them by the desk of the person they were labeled as belonging to, as a way to get the mess in the center of the room. One of the two people there is a YOUNG girl, 20 something. She is our aide, and just graduated from college this spring. She hasn't quit yet. Now when I tell you that her new profession is a "professional trainer", you can imagine what kind of shape and condition she is in.

Well, guess what, this 50 year old woman, and this young 20 something personal trainer were doing the "heavy" work! ME!!! The woman who couldn't move a thing on her own, except her oxygen tank, in a move 2 1/2 years ago!! Guess who can now squat properly, to use appropriate technique for using the thighs to lift and not the back, when a box is on the floor! Now I have to be humble enough to admit that I was still nowhere as good as the personal trainer was. Of the two of us, she was the "muscles" doing the heaviest part when we moved the file cabinets, armoirie type furniture and etc. I didn't compare to her. However, ladies and gentlemen.....I was NO slouch!I was just so amazed at what I could do today! Where did this new body come from? How could I do all this! How could it not be killing me? How could I still have all this energy and enthusiasm tonight after the hard work? How could I be dancing around as I listen to my music on my iPhone? How, how, how? I feel like the bionic woman! I feel like someone just came and took that old awful, terrible body away from me.

That body was the one that couldn't walk 10 feet without getting blue lips, even while breathing oxygen from my oxygen tank! That body belongs to the woman who couldn't stand for more than 1 minute or two (that was stretching it when I said two), without my feet hurting and having to sit down. That body belongs to a woman who STILL has MULTIPLE health problems. The person in that body fell to the couch the minute she got home from work (after sitting all day), and didn't move again, except for bathroom breaks, until time to go to work the next morning. I'm NOT kidding! I got so I slept in my chair 99% of the time. I got so that I changed clothes once a day, after waking up in the morning in yesterday's clothes! Doesn't that sound like someone living a nightmare? It was life as I knew it then, but sounds like a nightmare to me now.

How did I get this body? I can work out at the gym and not seem to break a sweat. I used to sweat if I was on my feet more than a minute. I can stand for a whole long time now. I can walk quite a distance to boot! I can dance around, do almost anything I need to do. I feel like a walking miracle today.

Another thought popped in my head just as I was thinking and writing the above paragraph. I am partly bionic anyway, when you think about it, I hear with "two artificial ears". My cochlear implants are today's miracle. I live in a delightful world of sound, beautiful sound. I hear the sweet voice of the toddlers I live with. I hear the music on the iPhone, the short story on my podcast, the current events on the radio! That in itself is a miracle, but I got that by surgery.

This new body, has had no other surgery of any type! No gastric bypass! I probably will never have any plastic surgery . Believe me I can now love my body, flabby skin and all. I won't need to do plastic surgery. Five years ago I was living in the depths of depression. I was hopeless. I NEVER wanted to be 50. I felt life was "OVER" for me.

Today, I'm so happy I make myself sick!!! I probably make other people sick too! :) I'm 15 1/2 lbs from my goal weight. I'm able to stand, walk, lift carry and do all the other things that once seemed to be too much for me. Ain't life grand folks? It all started with first, the power of example (Dick), then the power of the mind as I took the journey I've been on. If I can do this, what can YOU do, if you put your mind to it? Think about it! Your power is your mind. I didn't do it alone (thank heavens for Jenny Craig and for the people in my life). Whatever your dream, put your mind to it and find the tools that you need to find a new life. I now remain firmly convinced that we can always reinvent/renovate ourselves and find our miracles.


Gratitude Log

1. I'm grateful I had a good week weight loss wise. I had my slowest quarter since joining Jenny Craig, losing 13 lbs in 12 weeks. Then I finally get reinvigorated again, create some strategies to deal with today's challenges, and I have a week where I lost 4 1/2 lbs! Awesome!


2. I'm grateful for the new body I have! It's like a dream come true.


3. I'm grateful for raspberries. No, not the fruit! The kind that you blow when playing with little kids. They are fun to give and feel great to give. I'd blow a raspberry on Dalia's arm, then another arm, as she would dissolve into giggles after each one. I found they are sure pleasurable and would giggle myself as she would blow them on me. We had fun experimenting with where we could blow raspberries. They don't work on chins and foreheads. Must use arms, legs, cheeks, and tummies!


4. I'm grateful my post office shift for tomorrow got picked up. I have a 4 or 5 hour board meeting (it's a very important meeting to be scheduled for that long) tomorrow morning. I was really worried about someone picking up my shift, as the work volume has increased and not many people are wanting to pick up extra shifts. However, I went in tonight and found that while many shifts on the trade sheet for tomorrow were not picked up, mine was! Yay.


5. I'm grateful for my brother. I only have one and he is very special to me. I feel lucky to have grown up with him. Tonight I was looking at pictures and videos my sister sent, from our trip to Idaho. I loved looking at the pictures of my brother, and especially us together. You can see on my face how clearly overjoyed I am to see him, and I think he looks happy to be with Sallie and I.

Sharing Pictures

I felt like I had a lot to be grateful for today. Amongst them, the two little ones falling asleep (finally) in the chair next to me, and being able to snap their pictures. Aren't they precious?

Then this sweet little girl begging me to not close my door for the night while she was gone with her daddy. She wanted to come home and spend time to me when she got home. (Doesn't that just melt your heart?). Below is a picture of her when she first got home and came running to be with me. The 2nd picture is her clowning around for the camera.

Such a sweet face, don't you think?

These little ones make my day special so many times. Not least of all, today! I had a ball. I'm grateful for them!

Self Perception

I've been thinking a lot about how I perceive myself. I had thought that I had learned to be positive about myself. Most of my conscious thoughts about myself are very positive. However, I caught myself thinking a thought about what a truly terrible person I really am. I was shocked to realize that thought was even there. I spent some time analyzing why did I even think that? Where did this negative self-perception come from? How did I not realize that in my unconscious that thought was hiding there.

I was ready to blame others, including family, who've said negative things about my character in the past, thinking that I believed them, just because we always believe our family members are the ones who tell us the truth that no one else will. I figured something had stayed there and I'd never done anything but just believe the negative. However, as I analyzed the things that I remember being said to me in the past, I realized that was NOT where the blame lay. I am more skilled these days at not believing other's perceptions of me, whether from long ago, or more recent times. I'm more able to realize that what others are saying is only about their perceptions, not about the truth.

However, the more I thought about it, I realized that it was unfair to lay any blame at their feet. I couldn't think of anything that would lead to the thought I found hiding in my subconscious. What was the real truth? I finally realized that I was the person responsible. I was judging me. I knew every thought that goes through my mind, I knew how I perceived things. I knew the wrongs I'd done or thought in the past. With that knowledge, I judged me! I was the one that attacked myself and this led to the core belief about myself that was hiding in my subconscious much to my shock and dismay. I realized that I had more work to do. I needed to analyze the things that caused the negativity, and then to forgive what needed to be forgiven. I needed to be understanding and tolerant of things internally and lead myself to positivity in those areas. That's what I've been thinking about and working on this weekend. Truly learning how to make sure the positivity I've built about myself, is more than skin deep, and goes to the core beliefs that I hold internally.

In reading today I came across this statement.

• "In attacking others, we attack ourselves. In forgiving others, we forgive ourselves."

It's ringing a bell for me. I'm not sure yet all of the ramifications of this, as I need to think about it more. However, probably the thoughts I've had that are uncharitable and unkind (which I never would say), were attacks. I did attack myself, because I let myself down in allowing myself to judging and think harshly. I need to make sure that I forgive wrongs, because holding the grudges and the feelings, doesn't allow me to forgive myself for that which I need to forgive.

I've made lots of progress in working on my thinking and positivity in general during the last year. I also think that in general, I'm kind and charitable in my thoughts, about the people in my life. However, there are times that isn't true. This is what I need to work on now. The fallout from attacking others in my thoughts, only attacks me. The refusal to truly forgive some things, is causing me to not forgive myself. I've got my work cut out for me. I now know what my next area of learning and growth needs to be in.

Gratitude Log

1. I'm grateful for the warmth from the sun. Today at lunch, I went outside and read. It was wonderful to feel the warmth of the sun, as I remember so many days in the winter and during stormy times I miss this.
2. I'm grateful for the beauty of the mountains. I was looking at them today from the window at work. It's something I take for granted, living in a valley. They are truly majestic.
3. I'm grateful for stories to read and get engrossed in. I'm reading the 4th book of a series and loving every minute of it.
4. I'm grateful for the opportunity to learn and to grow. I look back at the changes in my life over the past few years, and am so glad that I started this journey, took my first steps to change, and that I can continue to do so.
5. I'm grateful for my gratitude logs. I now keep them every day. I'm starting to see a few things happen where I can see my perception changing and more positivity and enjoyment coming because I work so hard to find 5 things every single day to be grateful about, no matter how hard the day was. It's nice to see my gratitude and enjoyment of life grow through them.

Guilty?

I caught myself feeling guilty that I hadn't blogged in here for a while. I apparently caught some kind of bug this week. I ended up spending 2 full days pretty much chained to my bed. I don't know what I had, I only know that if I stayed in bed and didn't move, I felt fine. If I left my bed, I was hit with waves of nausea and dizzyness. The said nausea and dizzyness wouldn't go away until I was back in bed. If the dizzyness and nausea wouldn't dissipate after returning to bed, then I just had to go to sleep. When I woke up, I felt great....as long as I didn't move! If I tried to read or watch TV, the dizzyness would often return. Of course, my cure for that was simply going back to sleep. I think I probably ended up sleeping around 20 hours during the first 24 hours of being sick.

Tuesday I pretty much lost everything I tried to eat. I lost all motive to get out of bed, to get food as a result. The good thing was, that if I didn't eat, I didn't feel at all like I would need to vomit. I experienced no twisting, turning abdominal pains that I've experienced with other stomach flus. Wednesday, I managed to keep all food down, but still had some residual dizzyness and nausea. Today, I decided to try a return to life! Other than being tired and a tad dizzy once or twice, all was well during the entire day. We celebrated one of my nephew's birthday this evening at the Texas Roadhouse. I managed to enjoy both the food and the company!

I hope no one else out there experiences this weird "sickness". I keep wondering if it's really something contagious, or something weird my body does. This is the second time I've had the exact same sickness in the last 3 or 4 months. It might even be the 3rd. The last time I was a little sick, it didn't mimic this as perfectly, but it was close. So three times in the last four months seems a bit much. A bug, or something upset in my body chemistry? Only time will tell.

I guess the good thing is, that after every time that I've come down with this, it's the one sickness that I've not seen anyone in my household come down with. I don't like being sick at all, but I can be grateful that at least I don't feel miserable while in bed! By day two, I could read, watch TV, play games on my pager and keep myself pleasantly entertained. While it may not be a horrible illness, I'm crossing my fingers that I don't experience it again in the near future!

Gratitude Entry:

1. I'm grateful to be feeling all better!
2. I'm grateful that all it took to feel better when I sick, was just a nap.
3. I'm grateful to be able to be around people today. I was missing the people in my life during the last couple of days.
4. I'm grateful for family and enjoying time with them. We celebrated Mike's birthday tonight, and I did enjoy being with everyone.
5. I'm grateful for good food! Texas Roadhouse has become my new favorite with some of the delicious food they have!

It's all about Jenny...

Last week, I had thought that my Jenny Craig local center manager was trying to get me an appointment to meet with some national Jenny Craig people. I was more than a little disappointed. When I told myy Jenny Craig counselor of my disapointment last Friday she told me that that would be in the office this week, who was the boss of the local center manager. She said she'd help make it possible for me to meet this person.

I received an email from my counselor, telling me that the person could meet with me today, after my regular appointment. Needless to say, I was really looking forward to going in today! I dressed up to the nines, wore a blake and white skirt/blouse combo, where the blouse is tucked in, and the great belt with the skirt is showing. I felt it made me look even skinnier! :) I added black and white accessories, that I thought added to the outfit. To top it all off, I did my makeup and curled my hair. I hoped to make a great first impression.

I think I was successful! I met a woman named Carmen today. She was so warm and friendly, just exactly the type of person I click with so easily. She asked me right off the bat if she could hug me! Of course she could!!! :) She had been training a bunch of new Jenny Craig employees. They all came out and listened in while we talked, so I ended up having an "audience". I thrive when I do public speaking. It's my "thing"! It's my life's dream to be a public speaker. Someday, I hope to do that full time, but for right now, my dream is to be a Jenny Craig National Spokesperson. I talked to the audience, told her what I wanted to do, and answered some questions people threw at me. I had Carmen in tears at one point. She actually reached for kleenex, as I'd touched her. One of the women told her, I'd much rather have been listening to her today (meaning me), than watching the film we just watched!!!

She took some pictures of me, and was taking them with her to something in Denver, and then I think the next place was something in Las Vegas. She's going to be back in the area in 3 weeks. She is apparently going to talk to people for me! We will see where we can go with this. I feel very positive about the interaction today. I don't know where this is all going to go, but as I told her, "I'm not afraid to dream anymore, and I have a dream." I think I can inspire, and I want to do that. So everyone in my corner out there. Send out good positive vibes and thoughts out to help reach me on my way to my goal!

The events of today caused me to think of how nearly 3 years ago, after Dick's death and under his inspiration I decided to "start over". The steps I took led me to Jenny Craig, even though I only hoped at the time for some success in the weight loss area. I think I was guided there. If I end up being able to change careers and continue making over my life by a career of some sort with Jenny, I will be going in directions I couldn't have even envisioned at that time. My vision was much to small and narrow. Now my visions and dreams are exciting and life affirming. I actually believe in having a dream and going for it. I can't wait to see what unfolds for me in the weeks and months ahead. I know one thing. I'm EXCITED for my future.

Gratitude Entry:

1. I'm grateful for direction my life has been going, and for the role Jenny Craig has played in my life.
2. I'm grateful for sales. I caught a good deal at the mall today, and managed to get a blouse for $6.00! Loved that.
3. I'm grateful for innovative products. At the mall today, my feet were aching a little on my too thin soled sandals. I saw a pair of foam sandals at a steal ($9) and got them. The whole rest of the day I felt I was walking on clouds.
4. I'm grateful for chocolate dipped strawberries. I treated myself to two of these delicacies at the mall. Mmmmmmm good!
5. I'm grateful for good books. I've rarely made time to read in recent years, despite always enjoying good books. I started reading the Twilight series and am having a great time! I'm almost ready to start the 2nd of the 3 books, even though I just started the first book of 500 pages yesterday!

Gratitude

Reader's of my blog have notice I try to do a "Gratitude Entry" every time I post. If you click on the "Gratitude" title above, it will take you to Oprah's website, where you can click on her interview with the author of a book called "Simple Abundance". This book is what turned Oprah onto gratitude logs, and gave me the idea to look for things to be grateful for. If you're deaf, you can click on the "cc" version (also on the same page as the regular version).

After watching Oprah's interview with the author of this book, I've decided to revise my "Gratitude Entry", as I wasn't getting the full picture. What the author recommends, it finding 5 things every day to be grateful for. She states that doing this, causes you to "attend" more to your life and appreciate it more. Not only that, but it makes you be more positive, especially on the days when you're struggling to find 5 things to be grateful for. I'm not saying it as well as she did, so you can watch the video or listen if you want by clicking on my title above. It's over 20 minutes long, but I found it very much worth my while. I can't promise that I'm going to post every day with my gratitude log, but I'm certainly going to the 5 things I'm grateful for on any day I post!

Gratitude Log:

• Mackie practicing falling into my lap from the arm rests, followed by the cutest smiles and giggles!
• Dalia helping me eat my dinner, which remind me of just how good my Jenny Craig food is!
• Cami replying to my comments in her blog! Loved that!
• Jaimee being willing to ask me for a favor to help her out tomorrow. I love helping.
• Dalia and Mackie helping me to load the laundry into the machines today. The four little hands at work to help me are so precious.

Musicals

Despite being deaf, there's one thing I love, and that is a good musical! Sounds pretty unbelievable, a deaf person who loves musicals? No, not possible! Yep! Possible! Me! I guess you can all understand why I found it worth my while to have not one cochlear implant but two! I've always loved music, and I've always loved musicals. I'm not above singing, "Food, Glorious Food" (from Oliver) when I'm getting ready to eat something wonderful. Or even, during a beautiful morning drive up the mountain, "Who could buy this beautiful morning", also from Oliver. There are many other show tunes from other muscials I love and am apt to belt out in the privacy of my own car (so as not to inflict pain on the listeners).

Last Friday, I was invited to go see "Mama Mia" for a special girls night with my sister, my niece, my great niece (the little cutie), and my sister's friend. I'd not heard about the movie or known anything about it prior to the invitation to go to the movies. This movie turned out to be AWESOME! It was quite a treat. Tonight, at my great nephews birthday party, we were all talking about the movie and how great it was. My nephew, who's a movie buff, was quite surprised to find that he loved it and even bought the soundtrack. Guess who will probably do that now?

For those of you that don't know anything about it (like my deaf friends), there was a music group called ABBA, back in the 60's or 70's I think. Apparently 20 or so years later, a Broadway musical was created around the existing songs from ABBA. Mama Mia is that musical. Apparently it's a very successful Broadway show, from the research I saw on the Internet.

This show I saw was the movie adaptation of that musical. I had a great time, even without captions! Obviously, I don't know the music, never heard any of the songs before, but still enjoyed myself thoroughly. Bilateral cochlear implants certainly allowed me to get the most out of the movie. I was surprised at how much of the songs I actually understood. I was also thrilled that for the most part, I was able to follow a lot of the movie. There were still a few things that I had to ask questions about later, because I didn't quite understand. However, it was very little and not enough to prevent me from having a rollicking good time!

Gratitude Entry: Today I'm grateful for the technology that touches my life. Other gratitude entries have said the same thing, but I was talking about different technology, like the Internet, pagers, cell phones. However, today, I'm grateful for cochlear implants. I love the things that I'm able to hear with mine, whether it's beautiful music, or the sweet voice of a child. The things I hear today, I once would never have imagined hearing. I'm also grateful to Cochlear Corporation for making a great reliable product and for always continuing to improve their technology through continual research to make the processor I wear better, and better. Each upgraded processor adds tons to my life. Sound is never something I take for granted! With the little children in my life, I call them my "special ears". I'm so grateful from my "special ears" and the beauty of sound I get to revel in.

Blogger's Duel

Step right up everyone, the show begins. Over here in the corner is Cami, mother, chef, entrepreneur, and niece extraordinaire! In the opposing corner you find Ann, aunt, teacher and life renovation expert! Are these two ladies facing off in competition? No!!! We're here to enjoy how the other person blogs about the same pictures and and the incredibly awesome time we got to spend together connecting after years of not seeing each other! Ok readers, relax, I've finished trying to be clever! :)

The world of blogging has been heaven sent for me. The thing I enjoy most is the connections that are strengthened, and the abilities to share lives with friends and family whether near or far away. In the months of reading Cami's blog, I ached to get to know her kids. Her sister Ang, who lives even further away, brings the same ache as I read her blogs as well. My desire for time with my far flung family is strong.

One of the best ways I thought of to just hang out and have a good time while in Idaho, was a pool party at the hotel. When I finally got to see the great nieces and nephew I had in Idaho, I treasured every single moment and second with each of them. I did go to Cami's house, before even checking into the hotel. I was thrilled to see how warm and welcoming and OUTGOING every single great niece and nephew was! I felt so welcome from the moment I stepped foot in the door. After dinner (delicious Papa Murphy's pizza), the party moved to the hotel and the pool. I was so intent on the fun, I never even saw the sign below!!! I heard about it from Cami as we enjoyed chatting it up in the pool while she was holding sweet little baby Leigh! Trust a mom to notice these things! Cami, ever so practical had a good solution, "Fine, we will take her diaper off!" Works for me! :)




The four older kids played to their heart's content with their dad, and eventually with their mother while I held the 5th little one, who was nowhere near enjoying the water that was really a little too cold for her. Leigh was so precious and seemed content to let me hold her and gently sway her body back and forth in the water. While I treasured the precious little girl in my arms, I enjoyed watching the interactions and fun all of the kids had with their parents in the water. It reminds me of all the family swimming events when I was a kid, and of how much I enjoyed and remembered them. I hope that evening was one of those where the kids were building some priceless memories.

After the swimming ended, we all moved to the jacuzzi relaxing in the warmth and the swirling jets. Ahhhhhh, bliss. I was as relaxed as a day at the spa, but with much better companionship! :)

When it was time to go home and get kids to bed, the family moved to our hotel room to get everything together. While there, Sallie and I got together and posed for a picture with all the kids. I wished my arms and lap was big enough to wrap every single child into my embrace as we posed for the picture! Kudos to Cami, also photographer extraordinaire, for managing to get all of us in the picture, even though we are all in a small space sitting on a bed. For the reader's who haven't met my Idaho family, in my arms you see sweet McKay, who managed to snuggle in close for the picture. At the other end of the bed, you see Taylor next to his sister Kymball, who is holding Leigh. in the background you see my sister Sallie, who drove with me from Utah, holding precious Hunter. The only thing missing from this picture, Cami and Joshua, parent's extraordinaire!

All of you look at my face. Is my smile big enough? I don 't think so. The room wasn't big enough to encompass the joy I felt throughout all of my moments with family that day. I got to spend joyful conversation with my brother, get to know my nephew Kory's kids, and then party and spend time with Cami and family. The way I felt right then, I'd rather be in a million pictures like the one below with precious family members, than laying on the beach in Hawaii (and my dream is to some day go to Hawaii). I think that tells you everything about what this trip meant to me

Gratitude Entry: I'm so grateful for the love, joy and openness of little children. I don't know if I just never knew how much I loved children until recent years, or if the personal growth I've made has opened up a capacity to love more. All I know, If I treasure the little ones in my life, whether actual family, or children of my heart. My heart sometimes feels like it's going to burst with joy when I'm spending time with a little one.